I’m sure you’ve always noticed how clean and booger-free Renee Zellweger’s nose is on the red carpet. What’s her secret, you ask? Why, a professional nose-picker at her beck and call! According to The Mirror

But being a true movie star, [Renee can't] wipe the snot away by herself - oh no. Our Bridget Jones [has] a dedicated Andrex Annie to make sure her nose is greenie-free. We couldn’t believe our eyes as a woman armed with a red handkerchief dabbed at Renee’s A-list nose as she waited to go into the [Leatherheads] premiere at Leicester Square [Tuesday night].

When asked why she chosen the role of celebrity nose-wiper, the assistant replied, “Well, Lindsay Lohan already got the role of celebrity ball-licker and celebrity foreskin-bather ’cause she works for free.”

At the “Leatherheads” premiere in London Thursday night:

Rapper Jay-Z and singer Beyonce are finally ready to tie the knot. Blah blah getting married blah blah zzzzzz. People magazine says

Beyoncé Knowles and longtime beau Jay-Z have taken out a marriage license in Scarsdale, N.Y.. According to a source, the pair obtained a license Tuesday morning. The document is valid for 60 days.

In other more interesting news, Lindsay Lohan took a nose-picking constitutional around Beverly Hills with DJ Samantha Ronson yesterday. You know that old saying — you can pick your friends, and your can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your lesbian enabler’s nose! Unless she’s letting a couple of chunks of coke go to waste up there, in which case it’s your civic duty to help yourself to the leftovers. They don’t call it the Law of Conservation of Mass for nothin’.

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