Jessica Simpson wants to earn your respect the old-fashioned way — by getting totally naked on the big screen. Remember how well it worked for Elizabeth Berkley? Female First says:

“Jessica is in the running for a role that, if she gets it, will put her right on the map in terms of acting. The only hitch is that the script requires a number of quite graphic scenes including a full-frontal nude scene. Jessica is so desperate to land the role and get the industry’s respect that she’s ready to go against her better judgement, and her family, by agreeing to bare all.”

Jessica’s… most recent film ‘Blonde Ambition’ [failed] to gain a cinema release and [is] being branded a “disaster”.

I find there’s no better way to earn the respect of your peers than showing your tits. It’s fool-proof. So I can’t parallel park. Look! Tits! So I never actually finished college. Boobs! Get your boobs here! And maybe I had a Vulcan Koon-ut-kal-if-fee Marr ceremony instead of an actual wedding and maybe I moonlight as third level Dwarf Paladin and I might have once spent 36 consecutive hours suspended by my underwear inside a middle school locker, but BOOBS! See, it’s a lock! The only way you could possibly respect me any more right now is if I ran a Sicilian mob or had a top hat and a British accent.

Jessica not totally naked and therefore NOT garnering my respect this weekend: