Victoria’s Secret model Miranda Kerr posted this picture of her nursing her new baby Flynn on her Twitter yesterday, and being a huge proponent of the mother-child bonding process that I am, I thought I’d share it with you. And since the stupid baby is hogging all the bonding, I found some pictures of Miranda topless that will allow you to cultivate a primal attachment all your own. Consider it my early Mother’s Day gift to you!

Orlando Bloom took this beautiful picture of his long-time girlfriend Miranda Kerr’s boob and posted it on the internet for all the world to see. Also, there was something about a baby. I don’t know. Probably how it kept getting in the way of me seeing Miranda Kerr’s boob. The Daily Mail says:

Miranda, 27, gave birth to son Flynn on January 6 in Los Angeles,.

‘He weighed 9lb 12 ounces (a very healthy and big baby boy),’ Miranda wrote [on her website].

‘I gave birth to him naturally; without any pain medication and it was a long, arduous and difficult labour, but Orlando was with me the whole time supporting and guiding me through it. I could not have done it without him.’

There’s something so warm and comforting about seeing the mother-child bond, isn’t there? It’s like wrapping yourself in a cocoon of safety and goodness. I haven’t felt this calm and at peace since my gun permit was revoked.

File this one under “Ewwww”: Gossip Girl star Kelly Rutherford is still breast-feeding her two-year old son. Page Six says

The 40-year-old pregnant mother [said] she still nurses her walking, talking 2- year-old son, Hermés. “It’s an amazing bond with your child,” she said, even pointing out that the experience benefits her body.

Um, okay. Another amazing bond with your child? The umbilical cord. But there’s a reason you sever those kinds of bonds. Nobody wants to play with the kid who breaks out his mom’s tits during snack time, just like nobody wants to play with the kid dragging around a smelly old placenta on a dried-up string. Besides, the name “Hermés” alone is probably enough to make him the resident school bus spitball target. That poor bastard was doomed from the start.

At the 36th Annual International Emmy Awards:

Picture source: SPLASH NEWS