PHOTO CREDIT: thestar.com

The nutjob lady pictured above (the mannish looking one on the left) is trying to extort $10.8 million in support payments from Keanu Reeves for her four children, all of whom are adults.  From The Toronto Star:

A Barrie woman has filed a request to an Ontario court to compel actor Keanu Reeves to provide a DNA sample as part of a bid to get support for herself and her four children.

Karen Sala, 46, who is acting as her own lawyer, filed notice on Monday in the Superior Court of Justice family branch. Legal papers were served on Reeves’ business manager in Los Angeles two days ago. The first court date for the case is July 6 in Barrie.

A spokesperson for the actor said Reeves denies even knowing Sala and strongly rejects her claims. None of the allegations have been proven in court.

Sala said she has tried “privately” over the years to persuade Reeves to provide support.

In addition to the DNA test, Sala is seeking child support of $150,000 per month, retroactive to June 1988, as well as $3 million per month in spousal support retroactive to November 2006.

A Los Angeles spokesperson for Reeves issued a statement last night denying her allegations.

“Karen Sala’s allegations are completely false and absurd. Mr. Reeves has no knowledge of who she is,” Cheryl Maisel said in a statement.

Paul Knell, Reeves’ Los Angeles business manager, questioned Sala’s motives, noting that all four children are now adults.

“Before you disparage my client and lend validity to this, there’s clearly something wrong with someone who claims child support after all the kids have grown. I’m just pointing that out,” Knell said.

Keep in mind that this lady’s four children range in age from 20 to 25 years old.  I bet you’re thinking, “Gosh, that all sounds pretty fucking crazy.”  Well hang on a second, because this lady’s bucket of crazy is still at least half full:

Sala is the first to admit that she’s no angel, claiming that she and Reeves had a sexual relationship before and during her stormy marriage. She also acknowledged she is not sure which, if any, of her children he has sired.

But Sala insisted that Reeves was aware that he might be the father of some or all of her children, noting that at least one of them bears a resemblance to him.

Sala said she has a picture of Reeves when he was a teenager – though she was unable to produce it yesterday – and that she is hoping to get a photo from a friend of the two of them together more than 20 years ago.

Sala has what she describes as a sample of his handwriting, and said she has Reeves’ phone number and current address in Los Angeles.

Um… yeah, okay.  I don’t even really know where to start with this.  She might have a picture of them together two decades ago and she has some handwritten scrap of paper, and for that shit she wants nearly 11 million goddamn dollars?

Listen, I not only own both of the Bill & Ted movies on DVD, but I also have an old Ken doll with the head ripped off and I can totally draw a picture of some stick figure babies.  Based on this crazy bitch’s calculation system, I am probably owed upwards of 15 million dollars.  It’d be Canadian money though, so it’d come out to about $19.98 or something.  Hardly seems worth the trouble.

Star magazine is directing some pretty big accusations at Jamie Lynn Spears regarding the paternity of her unborn child — namely, that the father is NOT boyfriend Casey Aldridge, but instead a much older producer on her hit Nickelodeon show “Zoey 101.” Showbiz Spy says

The magazine quotes “two separate Spears family insiders” who believe the father is someone who works on Jamie Lynn’s kids’ show. ‘[Jamie Lynn was no longer even seeing Casey] — [he] is being paid off to be the family’s fall guy. Jamie Lynn dated Casey on and off over the past two years. But it was not steady. In fact, she was looking to date Kevin Federline’s brother about a year ago. Jamie Lynn went through a time of partying, and Casey was just a part of that.”

Even Casey recently posted on his own MySpace that he was feeling “blah” about his love life, and added: “Me and Jamie are over…”

“Casey is a serial cheater who has lied to Jamie Lynn time and time again,” a close friend told the magazine. “This past spring, he was forced to tell Jamie Lynn that he’d cheated on her and gotten that girl pregnant.” Casey was openly dating yet another girl at the same time as he was supposed to be romancing Spears. “Yes, my sister is dating Casey - they’ve been dating for a while,” said Kevin Seals of his sister Whitney Seals. “I know Jamie Lynn was real jealous about Whitney’s relationship with Casey.”

Up next, Duane “D” West has some harsh words for Jamie Lynn right before she heads for boot camp. Tomorrow on Maury, Who’s the Daddy of my Overweight Baby? Stay tuned!