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The color is fab. The rest of Julia Roberts’ look at the NY premiere of “August: Osage County” is not. Her Proenza Schouler dress is bulky and reads like a polyester uniform and the waistband sits too high, which makes her look wide through the middle. And THOSE SHOES. They’re a crime against God and humanity. May they suffer the same fate as Kellie Pickler’s platform pumps. Amen.

Style

Most clutches don’t hold more than a pack of gum and some lipstick and limit you to use of only one hand the whole night, but that doesn’t matter because they look awesome, and awesome trumps impractical and inconvenient. That’s one of the most fundamental laws of fashion there is.

Clutches are always the go-to bag for a black tie dress, but with the right heels, a clutch can make even jeans and a t-shirt look sophisticated and grown-up. Try a box clutch or pouch clutch for evening, and an envelope clutch or cross-body clutch for everyday.

And silver-under-$250 goes with almost everything. See gallery above for details!

Beauty

For being so fully dressed, Elizabeth Rohm sure seems almost naked. Pretty sure that officially cements her status as an International Woman of Mystery and Intrigue. Some of us have to settle for having it printed on our business cards.

More of Elisabeth in Randi Rahm + eight ways to get her holiday glam lip in the gallery above!

Style

I love Kristen Wiig, and she’s in amazing shape, but this is NOT her dress, mostly because it’s just too short. She looks totally uncomfortable in it and she’s tugging at the hem trying to pull it down in most of the red carpet pictures. Not to say she couldn’t pull off a short dress — I firmly believe you can be 40+ and still work a mini — it’s just that a dress that short doesn’t look good at any age. It would be just as inappropriately short on 20-something Jennifer Lawrence and thirty-something Anne Hathaway as it is on Kristen.

So how short IS too short? It’s hard to say. It depends on the fit of the dress, for starters. You can go a little shorter with a trapeze minidress than you can with a form-fitting sheath. A good rule of thumb is the tighter the dress, the longer the hemline should fall. Also consider the medium — lace/sequins/metallic fabrics should be a little longer; cotton-poly blends and silks can be a little shorter.

And if after all that you still don’t know if your minidress is too short, I’ve made a handy list of helpful guidelines for you.

TOP TEN WAYS TO DETERMINE IF YOUR MINIDRESS IS TOO SHORT:

10. A slight breeze would reveal your c-section scar

9. You see London

8. You see France

7. The only way you can exit a car without showing the goods is by bracing yourself against the door frame with both arms and using your core to catapult yourself out of the vehicle

6. Bending at the waist more than 6 degrees could merit a public indecency charge

5. The guy behind you keeps whistling “Moon River”

4. Mothers cover their children’s eyes when you pass by and old ladies cluck their tongues at you

3. Britney Spears wore something just like it to the VMAs a few years back

2. Bare cheek-to-chair contact when you sit down

And the number one way you know your minidress is too short:

1. You need a bikini wax to wear it.

More of Kristen Wiig in Marchesa at “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty” premiere in the gallery above.

News

Elizabeth Banks

The only thing worse than the cutouts on Elizabeth Banks’ dress is the color. It’s the same weird yellow that vitamins turn your pee. It’s also God’s way of letting you know if a frog is toxic. Everything about this dress tells birds “I taste bad and I will make you sick.”

Finds, fun, fashion, fails:

Katy Perry might be engaged to get divorced from John Mayer. (Huffington Post)

Brooke Mueller tested positive for meth, but naturally that doesn’t affect her custody rights. (Celebitchy)

Gaga says she doesn’t care that Madonna hates her and she’s sick of the comparisons. I say I don’t care and I’m sick of both of them. And so we are all connected in the great circle of life. (Evil Beet)

The Kardashians had a yard sale, so if you’re into spandex-based designer clothes that have been strained and stretched to their ultimate tensile strength, you really missed out. (Celeb Slam)

Presented without comment: Channing Tatum in a football uniform. (Socialite Life)

If you like vintage red sheath dresses and are a size 8, I just made your morning. (Modavanti)

Miley Cyrus continues her trite and cliched attempts at controversy by smoking a joint onstage at the MTV Europe Music Awards. (The Blemish)

Celebrities who turned down the Simpsons — including William Shatner and Bruce Springsteen! (Daily Stab)

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