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My favorite dresses from this year’s Golden Globes were Adele Exarchopoulos’ midnight blue Miu Miu silk gown and Lupita Nyongo’s bright-red Ralph Lauren Collection cape dress. They weren’t just dresses, they were works of art. The gradient crystals at the hem and the Jean-Paul Gautier-esque darts at the bust of Adele’s dress are perfection, and Lupita looks like some kind of alien high queen (and I mean that as a compliment here). We should all bow down at such a perfect construction!

I liked Margot Robbie’s bejeweled Gucci dress, but I don’t like Margot Robbie. She’s unsettlingly beautiful, like something dreamed up by eugenicists and government scientists in an underground lab. She’s probably one of those “socially integrated cyborg assassins” the neighbor’s dog is always telling me about.

Style

Awards season is upon us, but before we get to the Golden Globes or the Oscars, we have to muddle through the lesser and more pointless awards shows first. Like the People’s Choice Awards. Nobody really brings their red carpet A-game to the People’s Choice Awards. It’s sort of a practice round. Jessica Alba, Queen Latifah and Jennifer Hudson looked good in simple monochrome, and I didn’t love Allison Williams or Sandra Bullock’s dresses, but I didn’t hate them, either. It was just kind of “meh.” I think the best thing I can say about the 2014 People Choice Awards’ best dressed is at least none of these ladies look like they need to be milked or they’re gonna have an accident.”

News, Style

Funny, I would have thought Tom Cruise got custody of all studded clothing in the divorce. She probably didn’t contest the leather vests or the buttless chaps, then. I’m glad they decided to be civil about the whole thing.

Grommets and studs are a fun and trendy way of adding texture and heft to an otherwise boring old shirt… see gallery above for details!

Web finds + fun + fashion + fails:

This cozy herringbone moto jacket features a funnel collar and an off-center zip. (Modavanti)

Nobody can out-tool “Beauty and the Beast’s” Gaston. Nobody! (Mandatory)

Ann Coulter calls Mellis Harris Perry MSNBC’s “token” black person. As you can imagine, it was well-received. (Huffington Post)

If you have fine hair, this thermal styling brush just doubled the life of your blowout. (Fab Over 40)

Jessica Simpson shows off some SERIOUS weight loss! (ICYDK)

Audrina Patridge admits that “The Hills” was fake. I admit that I have never seen a single episode of that show. Only one of us has cause to feel proud. (ONTD)

Kurt Russell totally got busted picking his nose! (Celeb Slam)

Kanye isn’t a big fan of Coinye. Ugh, don’t even ask. (Evil Beet)

Tina Fey and Amy Poehler’s Golden Globes event has its own drinking game! (popbytes)

Hugh Jackman got a bad haircut, but I still love him. (Seriously? OMG)

Lena Dunham looking the best she’s ever looked at the Girls Season 3 premiere. (I’m Not Obsessed)

Jay Mohr called Alyssa Milano fat in a radio interview. Jay Mohr, of “comedy plagiarist” and “bird-chested wormy guy” fame. (Skinny vs Curvy)

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Style

A trapezoid is smaller on top and bigger on the bottom, so it’s the perfect shape for disguising the extra junk in your trunk after all that holiday binging. Not that Julia Roberts has any extra junk in her trunk that needs disguising here. I honestly don’t know if she’s put on any weight. She could be exactly the same size she always was, or she could be in the early stages of her second trimester. We’ll never know in that dress. And that, my friends, is the whole point.

Plenty of binge-worthy trapeze-cut tops, tank dresses and tunics in the gallery above!

Beauty

Melissa McCarthy has taken a huge step in the right fashion direction and you can really tell she’s trying here, so good on her for that. It just went a little wrong in the execution. A wrap dress is a great choice for her figure; the oversize floral print is not. The snakeskin clutch she’s carrying is gorgeous, but it’s too much texture and color for the dress. Her bold lip is the perfect shade of pink for her skin tone but the wrong shade of pink with that floral. She’s this close to getting it right. Except for the shoes, of course, which are every kind of wrong there is. They almost border on unholy.

THE FIX: A solid wrap dress in deep midnight blue or black violet and silver pointy-toe pumps instead wedge sandals. The clutch and the pink lips stay.

Check out seven ways to try a bold pink lip in the gallery above!

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