Because male models are complete pussies, Kate Winslet’s model ex-boyfriend Louis Dowler has gone crying to the British tabloids about how Kate broke his heart when she ended their relationship. Radar Online says:

“I don’t think Kate behaved well and it is still very raw for me,” Dowler [said] about his breakup with the 35-year-old actress.

“I was in love with her and you can’t switch that off over night.”

Dowler shared that the two went on a romantic trip to Necker Island, but after leaving the vacation Kate promptly ended the relationship, [adding], “I don’t want to go into details but it wasn’t a straightforward break-up… I’m a laid-back guy, so I am not walking around with a long face — but I do still hold a torch for her.”

Meanwhile, Kate has rebounded with Richard Branson’s nephew, Abel Smith, who split with his wife Eliza Pearson, after just 20 months of marriage.

How could you not know that Kate Winslet was a total man-eater? Just look at her. She’s dressed like a Bizarro black widow, for chrissakes. What, does she need claws and fangs, too?

At the premiere of pedophile anal rapist Roman Polanski’s “Carnage” in Paris last month:

PHOTO SOURCE: Fame Pictures

It seems Roman Polanski has a habit of raping underage girls — an actress who starred in one of his movies has come forward claiming he “forced himself” her when she was only sixteen, much like he forced himself on that thirteen-year old girl back in 1978. People magazine says

[Actress] Charlotte Lewis, who appeared in Polanski’s 1986 film Pirates, made the allegation in a press conference held at her attorney Gloria Allred’s office. Allred described Polanski’s alleged behavior as “sexually predatory conduct.”

“[Polanski] sexually abused me in the worst possible way when I was just 16,” said Lewis [in] a prepared statement. “He knew [how old I was] when he met me and forced himself upon me in his apartment in Paris. I have lived with the effects of his behavior ever since it occurred. I’ve traveled to the U.S. at my own expense to make sure that justice is finally done and that Mr. Polanski gets what he deserves. All I want is justice.”

It was alcohol, quaaludes and forced anal penetration for the eighth grader, so I imagine Charlotte got the same kind of special Polanski treatment. But remember, Whoopi Goldberg says that doesn’t actually qualify as “rape rape.” So to test her theory, I propose that we forcefeed her two granddaughters barbiturates and then lock them in a motel room with Roman for 36 hours and just “see where it all goes.” Then we can all sit down together and come to an agreement on what constitutes “rape-rape,” because this whole “legal gray area” is just so gosh-darn confusing.

All the pictures I could find of Charlotte Lewis on the internet (hey, did I mention she did Playboy? See thumbs 1-4):

Jamie Foxx is okay with making sexual jokes about someone else’s daughter, but if he had it his way, pervert Roman Polanski would be a goner. Digital Spy reports,

Jamie Foxx has said that convicted sex offender and film director Roman Polanski would “be missing” if he had touched his daughter.

The Soloist actor verbally attacked Polanski, who is currently facing extradition to the US after he fled the country in 1978 when he was convicted of having sex with a 13-year-old girl.

Foxx told Parade magazine: “If it had been my daughter who was barely a teenager – my daughter is 15 – Roman Polanski would be missing… period. It wouldn’t even get to the court case.”

He continued: “But, that’s me and I wouldn’t want anyone else to follow that because you should let the justice system work it out.”

Foxx added: “On the other hand, I don’t know Roman Polanski, but maybe if I had a relationship with him my answer would be different. I just think this whole issue is bigger than Roman Polanski.”

If he’s wondering how he should do the deed, I’d suggest bludgeoning him with a hammer. The hammer is his penis!

Thirty-one years after he was convicted of raping this thirteen-year old girl, director Roman Polanski was finally arrested last night in Switzerland, where he was to be honored at a Zurich film festival. The Daily Mail says

On arrival at Zurich Airport, police swooped on 76-year-old Polanski.

Polanski has been on the run from the U.S. since 1978, a year after pleading guilty to unlawful sex with teenager Samantha Geimer. Before [he could be] sentenced, he fled to Paris, where he has lived since. He has not set foot in the U.S. for 31 years.

Switzerland’s extradition treaty with the U.S., signed in 1990, means Polanski, a French citizen, may be flown to Los Angeles where he faces a long prison sentence.

For those of you who don’t know the details of his crime:

Roman Polanski was 44 when he conducted a private photo shoot with [the 13-year old girl] for the French edition of Vogue. Polanski performed various sex acts on her after giving her champagne and drugs.

Polanski was initially charged with rape by use of drugs, perversion, sodomy and lewd and lascivious act upon a child under 14.

On February 1, 1978, while awaiting sentencing, he left the U.S. [for] France, where he held citizenship, beginning a 31-year fight by the U.S. authorities to bring the director to justice.

An extradition request filed by U.S. officials was denied by the French.

So in addition to harboring smelly cheeses and general disdain, France is also apparently a safe-haven for child rapists and therefore understandably outraged by his arrest:

French culture minister Frederic Mitterand said he was ‘dumbfounded’ by the filmmaker’s arrest.

Mr Mitterrand said he ‘strongly regrets that a new ordeal is being inflicted on someone who has already experienced so many of them.’

And yesterday his ministry said French President Nicolas Sarkozy was ‘following the case with great attention and shares the minister’s hope that the situation can be quickly resolved.’

Yes, poor, poor, Roman Polanski. His parents were killed at Auschwitz and his wife was murdered, so that apparently gives him license to pump eighth grade girls full of barbiturates and sodomize them in a hot tub. Like that old Levitical law says, “an eye for an eye.” I’m sure “an eye for a prepubescent asshole” still falls under the umbrella of the Torah.

Dita von Teese modeling her new WonderBra line because she’s not 13: