Ten years after his other famous-people-naked book “A Private View” was published, reknown photographer Sante D’Orazio has published a followup entitled “Barely Private,” which, as the title suggests, is mostly pictures of celebrities baring their privates. Like Eva Mendes here with her nipple hanging out (click header image for NSFW above) and showing off visible bush in a pair of see-through panties (click image for possibly NSFW below). Sold and sold! Amazon.com says

Sante D’Orazio returns with a second volume of photo-diary-scrapbook, covering 1997 to 2008. Uncensored and provocative, D’Orazio [photographed] celebrities, models, musicians, actors and artists in various states of undress.

Included are Kate Moss, Naomi Campbell, Claudia Schiffer, Diane Kruger, Tricia Helfer, Stephanie Seymour, Liz Hurley, Jay-Z, Mickey Rourke, Angelina Jolie, Christina Aguilera, Pam Anderson, Keith Richards, Axl Rose, Damien Hirst, Julian Schnabel and many more.

Finally, something appropriately named! So many books and movies nowadays have such misleading titles. Like an “An American Tail” and “Free Willy,” for starters. Don’t even bother trying to get your money back at Blockbusters, because all they’ll do is laugh and point at you.

It usually takes billions of gallons of water and hundreds of thousands of years to form a crevasse as broad and deep Kim Kardashian’s ass crack, but she somehow managed it in just 29 years. Amazing, isn’t it? She’s like a real life Grand Canyon! With the right equipment, you could probably go spelunking in there. I bet she charges extra for that.

Leaving Brittany Gastineau’s birthday party this weekend:

PHOTO SOURCE: Pacific Coast News

A mistrial was declared yesterday in the John Travolta extortion case because of reported jury misconduct. If you don’t recall, two ambulance drivers were accused of trying to extort $25 million from John after the death of his 16-year old son Jett earlier this year. TMZ says

Justice Anita Allen released the jury and declared a mistrial after learning that a member of Parliament announced at a political convention that defendant Pleasant Bridgewater — a former Senator — had been acquitted by the jury.

It’s unclear if jurors had actually reached a verdict. There’s an unconfirmed report that one of the jurors may have communicated information to the Parliament member who spoke out.

Travolta’s rep issued the following statement:

“We are disappointed to hear about the alleged juror misconduct since we know that the Bahamian government, the court, the other jurors and John Travolta as the victim want to have this matter adjudicated through the judicial system. Mr. Travolta has and will continue to cooperate with the Bahamian authorities in the prosecution of the defendants for extortion.”

In more interesting news, if your body temperature were 86 degrees, you could live to be 200; most car horns honk in the key of F; and bats always turn left when exiting a cave. God, the gossip today sucks.

Also more interesting? Gwen Stefani’s bra:

PHOTO SOURCE: Bauer-Griffin

This is Tara Palmer-Tomkinson, who according to wikipedia is “also known as T P-T, …a well-known one-time English “it girl”, television personality, presenter and model.” That’s probably why I don’t know who the hell she is, but I can tell you she scares the bejeezus out of me. I think I saw her in a nightmare once, and when I woke up, I was muttering something about a witch’s teat. I’m just puzzled how celebrities can get away with flashing nipples in public, but when I want it to be a “shirt optional” day, it’s always, “indecent exposure” this and “you can’t come to the parent-teacher conferences anymore” that. Pff.

More double, double, toil and trouble at the Tatler 300th anniversary party in London

I get about five or six emails a day calling me a racist, or a misogynist, or a racist misogynist, so today I’m going to make a point to show you that I can be just as demeaning to men as I am to women, regardless of their race. I present “Twilight’s” Taylor Lautner, in all his wet-shirted glory. I guess a man frolicking in the waves and staving off a head injury is sexy to some people. And by “some people” I of course mean “queers.” I don’t want to come off as too self-righteous here or anything.

Even more after the jump:

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Today has been unbelievably boring, I know. I was actually starting to feel a little… bad about it. But then I remembered I had still had half a bottle of tequila under the driver’s seat of the Yugo. Problem solved! So shut up and enjoy Kate Moss‘ nipples, crybabies.

All nips at the Yves St Laurent fashion show afterparty:

PHOTO CREDIT: Bauer-Griffin Online

Rihanna showed up to McDonaldland a fashion show in Paris yesterday in this little “Hamburglar meets Whore” ensemble. And now all I can think about is what Mayor McCheese would look like with a boner. Thanks a lot, Rihanna!

It somehow eludes most female celebrities that a flashbulb makes black fabric transparent. Just like AIDS has somehow eluded Magic Johnson, even though he’s been HIV positive for 18 goddamn years. I have several theories, all of which involve Spiro T. Agnew, the CDC, and actual magic, but I’m not at liberty to divulge them until all my stuff makes it through customs and I finally assume my new life as Maria Conchita Alonza de la Piedad de Cavadas. I’ve probably already said too much.

Rihanna + black tank top + flash = nipple rings:

Megan Fox does a half-assed “If I Could Turn Back Time” Cher on the cover of next month’s Rolling Stone magazine, only without the thigh-high boots or the Iowa-class battleship backdrop. I just hope Cher will break out that see-through catsuit again and show this smarmy little bitch how it’s really done. You know, when she finally finishes her stint Madame Tussaud’s and has a little more free time. All that retiring can really keep a woman busy!

Bonus “If I Could Turn Back Time” video after the jump.

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Well, I’ll be damned. You can do something with sheer red lace other than hang it from an antebellum whorehouse window. Scarlett O’Hara could really learn a thing or two from Lady Gaga.

“Performing” at New York’s Fashion Week yesterday, plus some of her drunk at the VMA’s afterparty:

It’s a sad day when Tinseltown deems you too whorish and used up to play the role of a teenage slut, but that’s just what happened to Lindsay Lohan. According to the Post Chronicle

Lindsay Lohan has been snubbed for a new film role about a sexually curious teen after producers ruled the troubled star is too “jaded” to play the part.

["Undiscovered Gyrl"] writer Allison Burnett revealed she’s passed up the actress as a prospect in a movie adaptation of her novel about a teen blogging about her sexual coming-of-age.

Burnett [said], “(Lohan) is a wonderful actress, but her ‘baggage’ would only work against her.”

All is not lost here, Lindsay. If Hollywood needs someone to play, I don’t know… a down-on-her-luck lot lizard with a heart of gold, or maybe a meth addict stripper-turned-pornstar on the brink of a nervous breakdown, well, they’ve got their girl!

Shopping with her new fake lips and a see-through shirt yesterday:

PHOTO SOURCE: Splash News, Bauer-Griffin

Muslin: because it’s still illegal to wear cellophane as a shirt. Well played, Lindsay Lohan! Well played.