These pictures of Charlize Theron in the September issue of Vogue magazine are classy, refined, and altogether tasteful. In other words, incredibly boring. Knock yourselves out, squares.

Jennifer Aniston’s massive spread in next month’s Elle magazine is accompanied by her infamous self-proclaimed-perennially-lovelorn-poster-child-for-failed-relationships interview, but all that’s about to change. And then inevitably come crashing down around her. Nine MSN says

Jennifer Aniston isn’t wasting any time crying over what might have been — she’s too busy pashing Gerard Butler on the set of her new movie… after the cameras stopped rolling!

A source on the set of The Bounty Hunter has spotted Jen and her co-star stealing kisses and acting “lovey dovey” between takes while shooting a fight scene.

The source also claims the pair have been regularly sneaking off to Jen’s trailer together and trying their hardest to keep the romance under wraps.

I don’t speak Australian, but “pashing” must be down under slang for “staring at him while he sleeps while rubbing her uterus with a Loa Serpent charm and the afterbirth of a formerly pregnant ewe.” It’s a very rich and colorful language.

Bonus pics of her throwing popcorn at her new boyfriend on the set of “The Bounty”:

People are always asking me, “Hey, Abby — why has it been all ‘nipple’ this and ‘booby’ that around here lately?” And the answer is simple. It’s because according to Google statistics, that’s what 92% of people on the internet are trying to see. Pander to the masses, I always say! I also say, “I reject your reality and substitute my own” and “No griefing the Game Master!” Yeah, people don’t really like me all that much.

A Tom Brady bone for my ladies: