I can’t believe ESPN would put Ugly Wanda on the cover of their ‘Body Issue,’ because Jamie Foxx isn’t even a real athlete. He only played one in “Any Given Sunday.” That’s fraud, buddy!
Ever wanted to know what a full-grown adult male silverback gorilla would look like in a bikini? Well, here you go. Make sure you don’t look it directly in the eye. My Zoo Books say they perceive that as a threat.
Serena and sister Venus Williams at the beach on Sunday:
Serena Williams is obviously so impressed with her own ass that she can’t take her hands off it. She’s got the deathgrip on that sucker. Is she honking it? Is she making it talk? It’s like it’s got a life of its own, it’s that big. I half expect it’s a parasitic organism, kind of how Voldemort was living of the back of Professor Quirrell’s head. Notice how no one’s looking at where her hands are? She Who Must Not Be Named strikes fear in the heart of all who gaze upon Her.
At the Sony Ericsson Tennis Tournament kickoff party in Miami
Have you ever lain awake in your bed at night imagining tennis ace Serena Williams naked and clutching an artfully placed bouquet of flowers? No? Well, uh, what about Mike Tyson, then? A minotaur? Asiatic black bear? Michael Clark Duncan? Oh, come off it already. So maybe it’s not flowers covering her asscrack in your fantasy. Maybe it’s a tennis racquet and a feather boa. Or a tranquilizer gun and a strap-on. Whatever. The little details aren’t important. What’s important here is that I’m about to make all your dreams come true, baby, and I’m not even asking for your credit card number.
The entire probably LSFW shot from the last issue of Jane magazine after the jump. Remember, it’s still a naked lady with flowers over her crack, in case you work in a church office or something. Pervert.
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