Jessica Simpson performed at the Florida Strawberry Festival over the weekend in a pair of denim cutoffs — presumably the ones she wore in 2005’s “Dukes of Hazzard” — proving once and for all she is NOT a fatass. I mean, how could she be fat if she can still fit in the same hot pants? Scientists agree, it’s a real-life mystery!
Amy Winehouse spent her weekend frolicking in the woods with friends in nothing but her bra and denim shorts, sorta like a real-life Snow White, if Snow White was an undead corpse who escaped from the Daisy Duke section of Auschwitz. The Daily Mail says
The Rehab singer, who shocked onlookers with her emaciated frame, was spotted cuddling up to Sadie Frost’s sometime boyfriend Kristian Marr while soaking up the sunshine in a park behind a recording studio in Henley, Oxfordshire.
From the picture above, she also appears to have mastered the finer points of the Irish jig. Hop-hop back, hop back, two-three-four and bow!
UPDATE: The most awesome outdoor dancin’ you’ve ever seen after the jump
Mariah Carey showed up at Hot 97 studios in New York yesterday in the biggest, most unflattering pair of denim shorts the world has ever known, including Levi’s brief foray into bib-front overall shorts and the Navy’s unfortunate experiment with military-issue denim culottes. She got the knickers part right, but if she really wants to work the Regency Era, she’s missing the tailed jacket and a pair of shoes with buckles. Also a powdered wig. It’d help if she had consumption or dropsy or maybe unchecked syphilis and a staunch opinion on The Great Reform Act of 1832. Sorry, Mariah, but you’ve got nothing on colonial Williamsburg.
-
