Coco is a great visual reminder that you can’t spell “classy” without the word “ass.” You also can’t spell “assertoric” without the word “ass,” but I don’t really see how Aristotlean logic ties in with anything here. Let’s try and keep it relevant, people.

One more of her other S&M outfit and a week’s worth of Twitter pics:

Don’t get me wrong — I love a good FM boot or S&M inspired heel. Unfortunately, there is nothing good about today’s Name That Celebrity footwear. Somewhere in between “ankle boot” and “gladiator sandal,” the mystery shoe looks like it started off as a dominatrix heel for Rihanna but then was half-assedly cobbled together for actress Sienna Miller. And if it’s for Sienna Miller, it’s safe to assume the pouches for condoms and coke are hidden somewhere inside the heel. Because she’s a slut who likes drugs, you see. Zing!

The big reveal after the jump!

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