Kim Kardashian has already begun shooting her new 2010 calendar in Mexico, posting some of the candids from the photoshoot on her official website over the weekend. What’s odd about the pictures is that she made a point off concealing her ass in almost every one of the shots. Really, what the fuck is that about? Her ass is the only reason she’s famous in the first place. It’s like painting braces on Mona Lisa’s smile or a bra on Pamela Anderson. Some might even call it blasphemy.

Everybody has been raving about how unbelievable Jessica Alba’s post-baby body looked in her new Campari swimsuit calendar, and “unbelievable” would be right, because it isn’t fucking real. It’s all the work of digital retouching — a good three inches off her waist and hips and virtual breast implants. Nothing you see is real anymore. Nothing except our love, that is. And maybe the Zionist Agenda. That you can take to the bank, baby.