Today is more boring than church, so what better way to break up the monotony than with a little gratuitous T & A courtesy of Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Kate Upton? After all, man was made in God’s own image. It stands to reason that admiring her nearly-naked body would qualify as worship. Gotcha on a technicality, Jesus!

Amen:

The 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Explorer’s Edition Portfolio contains tons of bikini-clad pictures of models Bar Rafaeli, Brooklyn Decker and Hilary Rhoda (just to name a few), although I’m not entirely sure what makes it the “Explorer’s Edition.” Perhaps there’s a mariner’s guide to the Straits of Magellan and a crudely-drawn map to the Lost City of Gold in the back. You know, in case you feel like rubbing one out on the legend of El Dorado instead of Bar Rafaeli’s face. I’m sure that happens a lot if your last name is Pizarro.

A crew member put up several behind-the-scenes shots of Bar Rafaeli’s Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition shoot on Twitter today. The Daily Mail says

Bar Refaeli didn’t disappoint as she posed for the 2010 Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition in several bikinis throughout the course of the day – and she looked fantastic in all of them.

The 24-year-old looked to be having a ball as she joked around with the crew during the shoot at an undisclosed location.

In one shot the model is pictured wearing huge sunglasses and in another she cheekily pulls down her bikini strap while posing with the magazine staff.

So gorgeous, smart, and self-effacing to boot? Some people might say she sounds like the perfect woman. Well, I beg to differ. I say sweaty, stubby and inconsolably bitter is where it’s at. Call me, boys!

Ever heard that old joke that goes, “What’s better than a supermodel in a swimsuit?” Well, just so you know, the answer is supposed to be “SIX supermodels in a swimsuit.” If you answer “A pocket full of roofies and a hand-held video camera,” everyone stars staring at you all weird and covering their drinks.

From V Magazine’s first ever swimsuit issue starring Kate Moss, Gisele Bundchen, Claudia Schiffer, Naomi Campbell, Eva Herzigova, and Daria Werbowy: