I’ve always said Lindsay Lohan was a whore, but I never thought she’d take it so literally — Lilo will be auctioning off herself to the highest bidder in order to “raise money for charity” next week. Wink, wink. The Examiner says

The celebrity auction will follow the BRIT awards in a special after-party event. The highest bidder will get to see what a real night out with a true Hollywood socialite looks like.

Top prize includes a ‘First Class flights to LA plus a week at the Peninsula Hotel and a night out with Lindsay Lohan, Sunday Brunch for 4 at The River Room, and the ultimate cinema experience at the Millbank Cinema & Media Centre for the winner + 400 friends.’

I have a feeling this “charity” is not really a charity it all, but a do-ragged coke dealer named Stabby. Sorta like the “charity” Simon Monjack set up in Brittany Murphy’s name that wasn’t actually a charity, either. According to TMZ

Tthe foundation — run by Brittany Murphy’s husband, Simon Monjack — hadn’t filed the necessary documents to qualify as a charity or nonprofit group. As soon as we called the foundation for comment, the website immediately shut down.

But late Sunday the website resurfaced with a message — it would return all the donations “until we have our non-profit status approved before proceeding to insure that we can truly honor Brittany’s charitable desires.”

And I’m sure that “paying off Simon Monjack’s credit card debt” was first and foremost among Brittany’ Murphy’s charitable desires, followed by “paying off Simon Monjack’s attorneys’ fees” and “buying Simon Monjack a dozen custom-tailored Armani suits.” It’s a shame that her dreams and desires are going to have to be shelved because of the government and their bullshit bureaucratic red tape.

And good luck finding someone who’ll bid more than a pack of Newport Ultra Lights and a couple of bus tokens for a night with this hot mess:

PHOTO SOURCE: Pacific Coast News